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View Full Version : Would the REAL Rat Bast@rd please stand up?!


ChickaDee
09-22-2005, 07:00 AM
Ever had one of those moments where a situation does a 360 and nips ya in the butt??

Enter in one Mama, one impish little angel (horns finely honed) and two elder, unsuspecting siblings. It started out innocent enough....you know, the sweet lil' voice mentioning at 5pm THE NIGHT BEFORE a project is due at school the next day, "Mama.....I have to make a kite for school tomorrow. And it has to be...."out comes the lists of specific designs/measurements/NASA specifications etc. :eek: ) Isn't it funny how bouncy, happy, and animated a child becomes when they think they are gonna pull one over on their siblings???!!! Anyway, we purchase the nasty rat, strategically place the thing, and off we go to collect our victims. As we pull out of the church parking lot, I ask my oldest to hand me my sunglasses (which I've planted under the seat with the nasty rat). She calmly bends down, feels all around the floorboard for my glasses, reaches under the seat.....looks down AND*******************

Calmly says, "what's the deal with this dead rat under my seat?"

:wink: )

Little sh*ts!! I have no idea which one it was but I have a sneaky suspicion!!

It just isn't fair. Not only can youths pick up an intrument and learn it 20X as fast as us adults, they can obviously pull off practical jokes better as well. I'm going back to bed. :humm:

Dee

Randy McIntosh
09-22-2005, 07:16 AM
Repeat after me "Payback is a B....."

and start planing now. Someone has declared open warfare in you house! :smokin:

rpeitzsch
09-22-2005, 07:27 AM
But Dee, it would seem that your little angels have an excellent teacher: you! Once you've caught your breath, come on over to the Beer Tent. The Colonel's got another BBQ going and the mudbugs are ready.

By the way, nice rat!

Eric Wampler
09-22-2005, 11:44 AM
Forget the rat!!! I wanna see how the flying pumpkin turned out!!!

Eric W.

Jeanne
09-22-2005, 11:58 AM
Ok, that was the laugh I needed to brighten an otherwise dragging day. Dee, your sacrifice was not in vain. :lol: :lol: :lol:

Colonel644
09-22-2005, 12:08 PM
My Dear Chick-a-dee, Please PM me for "practical jokes" to pull on children.

But I'm laughing silly over that!!!

AllisonB aka Sweet Reed
09-22-2005, 02:25 PM
It just isn't fair. Not only can youths pick up an intrument and learn it 20X as fast as us adults, they can obviously pull off practical jokes better as well. I'm going back to bed.
Dee, this is just an example of how our local schools have succeeded in teaching "critical thinking" skills to our kids. :D Erin reached under the seat, saw the rat and immediately thought: 1) rats don't hitch rides in mini-vans (at least not the 4 legged variety) 2) if it was a real 'dead rat' it would have been baking for hours in the heat and stinking to high heaven! and 3) I'm too cool to show any reaction in front of my mom and sisters!

As for the payback, :lol: more critical thinking skills put to use!! I'm sure it probably took her all of 5 seconds to come to the conclusion that 1) where do rats and mice hang out?...the kitchen of course! 2) where is the best place to hide it for maximum "shock and ewww" value?...the first place sleepy, coffee addict mom is gonna look! I'm just surprised she didn't plant a hidden camera somewhere to record your reaction!

Now...if ya wanna get some good payback, go back to the store and buy one of those big hairy spiders. Put it in the bathtub, close the shower curtain, drag Miss Erin out of bed in the morning, send her off to the shower and just wait for the squealing to begin. :eek: :lol: :lol:

ChickaDee
09-22-2005, 03:24 PM
Originally posted by AllisonB aka Sweet Reed:

Now...if ya wanna get some good payback, go back to the store and buy one of those big hairy spiders. Put it in the bathtub, close the shower curtain, drag Miss Erin out of bed in the morning, send her off to the shower and just wait for the squealing to begin. Only one problem.....wrong kid!!! :p

Eric- the 'flying pumpkin' is scarier than the rat!

I'm thinking 'bout shearing the rat and calling him RUFUS. :lol: :lol: :lol:

What is that, that freaky thing?
(Yes, thatís right
Itís a naked mole rat)
Hey, wait I canít hear the girlies sing
(Listen to the naked mole rap)

I heard Smarty Mart was
Haviní a sale
On a hairless pink rodent
With a long skinny tail


Can I get a boo-ya

Utah Joe
09-22-2005, 03:41 PM
I'm thinking 'bout shearing the rat and calling him RUFUS.
Dee, don't shear it. Get some glue and thread...he would make a great sporran.
Joe

Colonel644
09-22-2005, 03:44 PM
Funny!!!
JOe that is a novel idea!!!! put chains on him and strap him around yer waist!!! I Love it!!!!

Tommy P.
09-22-2005, 04:17 PM
Dee, Rufus is good, anything but.....ahhh never mind :humm:

SKYEMAN
09-22-2005, 04:39 PM
Hilarious. Wish I'd been there. :wink:

Eric Wampler
09-22-2005, 04:55 PM
Originally posted by ChickaDee:

Eric- the 'flying pumpkin' is scarier than the rat!

I'm thinking 'bout shearing the rat and calling him <span style="font-weight: bold">RUFUS. :lol: :lol: :lol:

</span>Well, I think the Pipe Band Chicken should be worried at this point :wow:

I'd still like to see the flying pumpkin. I can't help but think of Linus and Sally out in the pumpkin patch on Halloween....

Eric W.