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Piping and Drumming Jokes Be nice (please)

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Old 12-23-2011, 04:06 PM   #1
John Bolt
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Default Drinking and driving

I would like to share an experience with you about drinking and driving. As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home after a holiday party or two over the years.A couple of nights ago, after band practice I had a few too many beers.Knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before - I took a bus home. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise since I had never driven a bus before and am not sure where I got this one.

Have a safe holiday season!

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Old 12-24-2011, 02:59 AM   #2
Roddy Livingstone
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Default Re: Drinking and driving

Similar thing happened to me and a drummer from the band I was playing with a few years ago.

After the pubs had all closed we realised that we'd missed the last bus, the last train and there were no taxis. We came upon the idea of 'borrowing' a bus from the local depot. I agreed to keep watch whilst my companion did the deed. He finally reappeared after about an hour in the driving seat of a bus. "What took you so long?" I asked. "Well I figured we needed a Number 79 to get to the stop we needed and I had to move a dozen other buses out of the way as it was parked right at the back of the shed", he replied!
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Old 01-02-2012, 09:32 AM   #3
TwitchyFingers
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Default Re: Drinking and driving

One night, after a session, we all left the bar together. I stumbled through the parking lot, weaving and singing at the top of my lungs. I searched all my pockets, searching for my keys and then realized they were in my other hand. I started the car, had left it in reverse and barely avoided smacking into the wall. I lurched forward and then slammed on the brakes, realizing I had left my music book on the roof of the car. More singing and stumbling as I gathered the sheet music that flew off when I hit the brakes. Luckily, everyone had left, so the parking lot was empty for my music search. At last, I got in my car and weaved through the parking lot. I sort of went over the curb as I left the driveway.
I hadn't gotten half a block before I got pulled over. The cop came up and asked if I had had a few. "No, sir.", I said.
"You're lying. I've been watching you from the parking lot across the street since you stumbled out the door of the bar."
He gave me a field sobriety test and breathalyzer.
"You passed. The breathalyzer shows you haven't had a drop. How the hell have you not been drinking when you looked so drunk as you went to your car?"
"Easy" I said, "I'm the designated decoy."
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Old 07-18-2018, 02:50 AM   #4
Paul M Burke
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Default Re: Drinking and driving

Quote:
Originally Posted by Savoca06 View Post
I am not sure if this was true. My cousin has been working many years and asked him about this decoy thing and he said it wasn’t true or he has never heard of something like this ever.
Probably why it is posted in the "joke" forum.

Paul.
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Last edited by Michael New; 07-19-2018 at 10:29 AM. Reason: Removed spam link.
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Old 07-19-2018, 01:33 AM   #5
brent
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Default Re: Drinking and driving

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paul M Burke View Post
Probably why it is posted in the "joke" forum.

Paul.

It was a clever way to get spam posted though!
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Old 07-19-2018, 10:15 AM   #6
Paul M Burke
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Default Re: Drinking and driving

I seldom click on those links anyway, so I suppose yes it was.

Buy isn't that a lot of work for a spammer, actually reading and getting involved??

Paul
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Old 07-20-2018, 04:16 AM   #7
brent
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Default Re: Drinking and driving

Maybe, bots are getting smarter and smarter!
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